razor rip off

5 blades in a razor with lubrication strips
what the hell is your face growing, let me give you some tips.
if you are a hipster with a beard like a privit hedge
chances are you razor is as empty as your head.

if it's your scull you're shaving just one blade will suffice 
under a quid for 5 blades will keep your patch shorn nice.

But as for multi packed colours and multi bladed contraptions
chuck em in the bin and similar violent actions.
A safety razor does it and individual bladed pack
buy the lot for about ten quid and there's no looking back.

20 shaves a blade and the holder lasts 30 years
But if you are as tight as me... just grow a goaty beard.

(Only half as much shaving.)

And if that lady that shares my life
want to stay being called my wife.
don't wait till I put a new blade in
and leave it like a badly opened tin.

Buy a set of pink 5 blade lubed
and shave away the parts so rude

So learn from me my hairy readers
Gillette may be the shave implement leaders
but many years of chopping face
one blade will do and takes less space.